In every crowd, there’s always the person that is constantly trying to qualify him/herself. This person is constantly trying to justify what they are good at, what they have achieved, how much money they spend on certain items (or all items). They are constantly spouting off the list of things they’ve had to accomplish in their day as some sort of justification, an attempt for qualification.
But why? Why is it necessary for someone to feel they must constantly have to qualify him/herself?
Perhaps a life of peers or friends and family making them feel as though they are never enough or qualified enough or smart enough or rich enough, etc is what makes a person feel so inclined as to attempt to justify everything about who they are as a person.
I’ve felt and heard myself go down this path before. In fact, I’ve recognized it in several conversations within the last few weeks. I don’t like it and I’m trying to be more aware of it when I feel myself moving in that direction. I believe it ultimately comes from a place of being beaten down over time. A slow, unrecognizable training of one’s mind to believe they have to justify who they are and what they are doing and how much they are earning. Ultimately, I think insecurity plays into this as well.
What I have noticed about this, is I really don’t like hearing other people justify their every move, so why would they want to hear me try to justify my every move? It wears me out, so it must wear them out too, right?
Maybe it doesn’t bother you to hear others do this, but if it does, what can you do to help someone feel comfortable and confident enough so they don’t feel obligated to continually qualify the person they are? What can you do to love someone through those emotions and circumstances? Help others to realize they don’t have to attempt to qualify themselves when they are with you. Make them comfortable, make them know they are loved and they are enough just as they are.
Laughs and Love,